Everything proposed by “the metaverse” is worse than alternatives that already exist

Let’s look at Zuck’s pitch video, for example. In the metaverse you can…

Play poker with your friends
There are already plenty of ways to do this online, right in my browser. If I really want to see my friends’ faces, we could setup a zoom call while we play, and I can see their actual faces, rather than a stiff digital avatar. Look at some digital art
I can already do this in a browser. I guess if it’s a 3d model, rather than a 2d image, having a VR headset helps, but how often do people sit around looking at 3d models, just for the sake of it? Unless you work with them somehow, probably not very often. Bring your items from one videogame to another
Sounds very cool, but if this was something that game creators wanted to do, they could have already been doing it for decades. It’s not a technological problem, but a lack of will from the game’s creators. The only thing stopping me from bringing my World of Warcraft sword into Everquest or Black Desert online is the games’ creators willingness to implement this feature (and it actually sounds like a lot of work for them to support, once you start to think about it).
Also, would you really want a bunch of people bringing their Roblox items and gear into your Lord of the Rings Online server? Have these people ever actually played a videogame? Communicate via hand gestures instead of typing
It’s really hard to imagine how waving my arms, like a caveman, is a superior form of communication to using a keyboard. Watch videos with your friends, online
Plenty of ways to already do this. I don’t see how donning a VR headset would improve the experience. Again, if I felt the need to look at my friend’s faces, while I watched the movie, we could just start up a group video call. Go to a concert together with friends
Seems like watching the concert, streamed, would be far preferable to being in a virtual stadium, where a 3d model of the performer is far away from me, and I’m surrounded by a bunch of lifeless avatars, half of whom are probably AFK. Attending a concert’s “after party” in a virtual space
Again, this sounds far inferior to just connecting to a public video chat lobby, where you could actually see faces.But if you really want to hang out with a bunch of anon 3d avatars, go play VR Chat. I’m guessing you’ll nope out of there within the first 5 minutes. Play VR online ping pong
You can do this right now. There are tons of really fun multiplayer online VR games you can download from Steam right now, no metaverse required. Why aren’t you playing them? Attend a virtual work meeting in a virtual conference room
Obviously, you can already do this now, with Zoom, Google Meet, Microsoft Teams, etc, but with the ability to see your coworker’s actual faces.
If Bob from accounting really wants to be a cartoon lion, there are plenty of video filters that already give him that ability…hooray! Learn about the solar system, for a school project
Obviously there are already tons of educational materials, on the internet, right now. There’s Youtube, Udemy, etc, etc, etc. Incorporating 3d models into the lessons is cool, but there’s nothing stopping educators from using something like WebGL to do this in a browser window, except that it takes a lot of time and expertise to create those kinds of educational materials. Do your shopping from a virtual shopping mall
This sounds a lot less convenient than just buying stuff from a website.Also, it’s not realistic to think that stores will create a to-scale 3d models for most of their products, so you’ll probably just end up looking at a bunch of 2d jpegs anyway.

So yea, if you think this whole metaverse thing is all hype, you’re not alone.